I have a new mantra in my forties:  "You make choices".  I truly believe that the generation that is now parenting grew up with so much entitlement that we see ourselves as stuck, helpless, hopeless victims when we can't have it all or do it all.  

Once we stop blaming life or our circumstances and own responsibility for our lives, we can come to a place of peace (That aha moment of, "Oh, that's why I chose this; well then I'm willing to live with the consequences of that choice because I value...."  ...you fill in the blank)  The other option when we see we truly do have power to make choices is to make a change... (Life can always be different).

Am I stuck at home with kids?  No, I chose that when they were little.  Along with that choice came occasional ruts of boredom.  Along with being home also came huge financial sacrifices!  Is that life's fault?  Was I stuck?  No, that is what the business world calls "opportunity cost".  When you choose one thing, you are choosing to say no to other things.

Do I have to work outside of the home?  Me personally?  No, but I choose to now because I want my kids to have things like piano lessons and I want to have some extra savings.  Does that mean I will be tired and miss them at times?  Yep...opportunity cost.  Does that mean I HAVE to work outside of the the home?  No.  It means I am no longer willing to sacrifice those things in order to be home.  Does that make it the wrong decision?  Not if I understand and am willing to take responsibility for the opportunity cost.

Do I deserve to be sheltered from the risks that go along with owning a business?  Nope, opportunity cost.

Can I get that Ph.D and have 4 children?  Hmmm, maybe.  For some that window might close.

Is it my fault I got sick?  No.  Should I be in denial and try to keep up with everything I did before I got sick?  No, my job is to take as much responsibility for my health as I can and to use my gifts in ways God has purposed for me to use.  He does not want to stop using me when I am sick.

Are you stuck in a bad relationship?  Hmmm.  You cannot make someone be nice, but you are making choices.  Is it the right choice?  I would never presume to have the answer to that.  What I will say is, own the consequences that go along with that choice.  You can stay, hoping that the good times outweigh the bad.  You can leave and trade a time of loneliness for peace.  Neither is necessarily the right answer, but you own the consequences of the choice you make.


Proverbs 4:14 says  "Counsel and sound judgement are mine; I have understanding and power". (NIV)

Do you see that?  God gives judgement and power!  Power to have it all work out the way we want?  Not always, but judgement to see that we have choices and power to choose other options.  We are not helpless or stuck.  Isn't that a gift!  Okay Generation X and Y, time to stop whining and accept the choices we have made and the consequences that go along with those choices.